Amazing Grace - Midi playing

"Coping With Grief"

"An Open Letter"

"From the Heart"

Written to a dear friend who has asked me
to share it with you all.

My Letter!

Hi Dear Friend I am back - Ok I will tell you but
remember ...

You asked me!!!

To let you know how things went for me while I was


Ask me how I am and I will always say "I'm Fine"

Truth Time - I am telling a lie - not so much to you my
friend, but to myself!

The hours drive to Kelso is usually a most enjoyable trip.
The car sings - I sing to my favourite tape - and the hour
passes so quickly.

Not this time! Neither the car, nor I sang at all.
I just wanted to turn around and go back home again.
But I knew I had to go and face it!

And do it alone!

Even though I had had offers from all of the family
to go with me.

These few days spent at Kelso have been awful.
Whilst repairing the damage due to neglect during
George's illness - emotions ran wild - it was like a
hammer ever hitting at me.


On arrival, the Park owner and friend of 20 plus years
and I, talked - and we cried together - she worse
than me.

I stayed with her for over 2 hours, then I finally went to
open up the van and annexe.

My friend gave me time and space to tackle the chores,
and my memories.

On entering the annexe I walked into invisible, sticky
cobwebs that were all over the place.
With the nasty black spiders running everywhere.

Also all the outdoor furniture looked as if it was totally

I was ready to give up - but I sluggishly worked away at the
grime until the evening of the second day, when the

"Magic of Kelso"

returned to ease me in my sorrow.


This morning, before I was out of bed, my friend came
in and made me a coffee.

Then with tears streaming down her face, she said,
"Laurie .. I have been getting such strong vibes"

Whilst comforting her, I asked what was happening
for her.

She said ... "No - it is you!"

I am feeling your sadness so much!
I know you speak and look happy - but I feel the
sadness beneath it all"

Now she is a strong, tough person and is "as hard nails"
usually but ... her "vibes" never lie.

We wept together (again) and now for the first time ...
I admitted to myself, and to her, how sad I was.

But at the same time I felt a heavy burden was lifted
from me.

I had learned it is ok to be sad!

And now I thank you dear Terry, so much, for the chat
we have just had.

You have become such a dear part of my life.

I hope this does not feel a burden to you my friend,
I never want it to be that.

But it was you who taught me how to fly and be

Love ... Laurie


"My Thoughts"

I have travelled a bumpy road of discovery - to finally
accepting that a grieving period is not only normal
but necessary, this allows the healing to begin.

Accept what you are ...
Accept how you feel ...

And go on from there!

To continue your journey through my pages.

Thank you from the bottom of my heart dear Whisper,
for making this special background.

November - 2002